Feeling De-Valued?

Hey! I LOVE " blogging with you." Because I can be real and I can be myself. No reason I have to act like I have it all together, right? I am human. Though I have become a very confident woman and blessed by the Lord, I also have struggles like everyone else. Surprise! LOL! I know you are shocked right? You thought I had it all together now. (I do a bad job at sarcastic joking, dont I?) Thank you for listening to my *"mish-e-gas." LOL get it? I am so glad you are in my life.

I want to announce to you, my beloved friends and fans that during this Spring Season, more times than once, twice, etc, I ACTUALLY THOUGHT OF GIVING UP SINGING LIVE FOREVER! Planning to never minister live/ do another concert every again was something I was highly considering. I said it out loud numerous times and this seemed to be a REAL and heartfelt option. What should I say from here? I suffered with this decision as I prayed and asked my God, Does my voice really matter? Didn't I say or sing enough already? Is it over? My passion for singing left me.

But the more I pray today, the more I think of all the people I know and the people I don't know who are suffering. I remember now that God uses music and that music can be a very powerful tool to bring a message of hope, of healing and of salvation in ways that the spoken word is limited. I recall now "the meeting" I had with the Lord when I was just 8 years old and had thought about ending my life. A voice I heard in my head said, Michelle Gold, you cannot die. I have have a purpose for your life to sing and bring a message of hope to the world. I knew the thoughts were too mature to have come from my own heart. these words MUST have been from our God who loves us and has a plan for our lives.

Today, I ask God to renew the joy of my salvation. I ask Him to restore the joy of sharing the message which I have so passionately shared for over 11 years (just counting my years singing Spiritual music alone) in the U.S., El Salvador, Denmark and all over Europe and Israel.

So what happened? Being in Nashville, where everyone wants to be a star and everyone sings like Celine Dion and Ce Ce Winans, I got jaded. Beginning to unappreciate my gifts, I began to cast them aside. How am I valuable in this world?, I would ask myself. There are 90,000 other singers who sing about God's greatness so why me?

Today I know that I am valuable in God's Eyes. We must look at our lives, our selves, our gifts our beings THROUGH HEAVEN'S EYES! (Check out my favorite song from Prince of Egypt called Heaven's Eyes for the full message) I once had a vision of a candy store FILLED with chocolate bars! ooh! My favorite! It was revealed to me in a dream how all of those chocolates were so important. If we only had one, we would be sick of it soon. The variety of taste and richness fulfills us. So our gifts and talents also are important NO MATTER HOW MANY OTHERS EXIST! This vision I remember now and I realize how my existence matters.

12-Step Perspective or "spin": Just for today, I shall know that I am valuable to my God or higher power.  God does not make junk. We are His handywork. I will look at myself thru the eyes of a LOVING Father. I will speak to my spirit the way I speak to my little baby girl- with love, gentleness and great faith in her abilities.

Messianic Spin: the prophet Isaiah said to God's people like you and me:  (Chapter 62)

You will be a crown of splendor in the LORD's hand,
a royal diadem in the hand of your God.
No longer will they call you Deserted,
or name your land Desolate.
But you will be called Hephzibah (my delight is in her)
and your land Beulah (married or beautiful)
for the LORD will take delight in you...

PRAYER OF RESPONSE:
Oh my Adonai, my mighty God and loving Father, please imprint these words onto my heart- that I am loved by you, that I am your royal diadem and that you delight in me.
Remove the ugly words in my head that I say toward myself and help me to see myself and my gifts through heaven's eyes. May I NEVER throw away the gifts you have given me. That would be aweful and it would hurt your heart as much as seeing those I love throw their gifts and lives away. Fill me with your sense of purpose and restore the joy of my salvation. Amen.

* *Mi-she-gas. n. (pronounced mish-eh-GOSS). Also spelled mishegoss or mishegaas. Once again, Jewish people can’t agree on how to spell anything, such as Hannukah or Chanukah. Mishegas is a Yiddish word that literally means insanity or madness, but is more often used in a playful description of a wacky, kooky state of being. For example, "Mishegas of Motherhood" is intended to describe how children drive their parents crazy.

American Idol's "Big Mike" got saved, How about you?

Last night, on American Idol, one of the top contestants, Big Mike, who has a voice like Luther Vandross got booted off. (temporally, that is) With his great talent & his winning personality, you just knew he was bound to win. But there he was, in the bottom 3, the one how received the least amount of votes.

Did America forget to vote? It left us all feeling lost. Was all of his talent and personality worthless? I don’t think so!!!! We all knew he was born to win. He has class; he has heart and smooth vocals that can tame a lion. LOL!

Bottom line, the judges then gave him a free pass, which overruled all of America's votes or lack of. AND BIG MIKE WAS SAVED!!!!! You’ll see him on the show next week and he's bound to be a winner or at least make great music for us all.

A guy with a powerful voice- a new Dad, a man with a beautiful wife who cries for joy on TV when he wins and probably cries with love for him when he loses.

But what about you? Are you like Big Mike? Have you been overlooked by the world? Have you been unfairly forgotten? Has all the work you've been doing gone totally un-noticed? Do you feel scared about your future and family's security in this crazy economy? Do you feel lost?

Well, I was once like you. Then, Yeshua, the Jewish Messiah, came along and just like Big Mike, I GOT SAVED! Saved out of being sick and tired of my life, saved out of sorrow, saved from fear of my future (anxiety). And I was saved out of my biggest fear of all- the fear that God was far away.

I know now that Yeshua, the Jewish Messiah, gave his life for me and for you as an atonement for our wrongs, our sin our shame. He is never far away but lives in our hearts when we invite Him in. Believing in Him, the Jewish Savior of the world and of MY HEART, I have never been more happy. And as for my Judaism, I have never been more Jewish in my life than I am now by believing in the Jewish Messiah. I just prayed a simple humble prayer sincerely to allow him to lead my life.

Do you want to be saved? I want you to be saved. God is proposing to you. Will you say yes?

PRAY WITH ME:

Avinu Malchenu, my Father and King. I admit to you that I am lost without your love. I need to be saved. Come into my heart and be my leader and my friend. Be my Messiah. Replace my fear of the future with hope for tomorrow, replace my sorrow with joy and dancing. Thank you for writing my name in your book of life, heaven, forever. There is no greater joy than YOU.

Amen.

Further Reading for Believers:

Messianic Spin: Yeshua (Jesus in Hebrew) was born the Jewish Messiah and has come for His Jewish people and for every man world-wide. There is nothing more Jewish we can do that to believe. His mother's name (whom we call Mary) is really Miriam and He, the anointed One celebrated the Jewish Holidays and came to fulfill the law. Mathew, Mark, Luke and John were all Jewish believers and the first thousands of believers were all Jewish too! Cool! Huh?

12 Step / Over-comer's Spin: Without a higher power, we are all lost and live in fear. We do not need to live in fear. we can trust our higher power to care for us and to make us successful or to help us heal in times of failure or unrest. Step 2 talks about believing that a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. 

Seeking for our higher power to SAVE US from life's insanity or self-produced insanity iS WHAT HEALS US. When all others have let you down, why not let God save you? He is not a man that He should lie or cheat or steal hearts. He is awesome and loving and wants what is best for you.

WHY NOT MAKE MUSIC TOGETHER?

You have turned my sorrow into joyful dancing.

No longer am I sad and wearing sackcloth.

 I thank you from my heart, and I will never stop singing your praises,

 My LORD and my God. (Psalm 30:11-12)

It’s 4:40pm at the Gold-Franco house and Bella and I share something extremely special. Besides hugs and kisses and the regular day’s grueling schedule of being a Mom,  we STOP and MAKE MUSIC TOGETHER!!!           

Shaking the shakers in the air, Bella joins in by clicking her sticks. A few seconds later I hand her the my two blocks showing her the awesome rhythm they make. Then, the harmonica makes its sounds and before you know it, Bella and I are marching around the room singing and playing. I say to myself, “I cant believe I am marching around the room with a sinus infection and a headache the size of Brooklyn!" But we laugh and sing and supernatural strength comes over me when I see her joy!

This is the joy of music together. I’ll be teaching  a class this April in Nashville at the Green Hills Mall in TN. (Thursday afternoons) The class comes with 2 cds (one for the car, one for the house) jammed with phenomenal LIVE music for children with exotic tempos &  interesting melodies from all over the world, major and minor, and even some songs we all grew up with. It’s fascinating music to share.

12-STEP / OVERCOMER’S PERSCPECTIVE:

I sit on the couch now playing footsies with Bella. I wish every moment was like this. But it’s not. Sometimes she just cries and cries and wants to be held when I want a break. She tickles my toes and kisses one saying MMMMMMMMMMWA! LOL!  I am learning to ASK GOD FOR WHAT I NEED.  I need His SUPERNATURAL Power. 

Why not read the proverbs and psalms or scriptures everyday? His love and His word refresh us like a fountain pouring over us. Since becoming a Mom, I consider the Word of God medicine to my soul. I sit in bed with my coffee and my Bible. Without it, I tire, I have compassion fatigue and nothing within me sparkles with joy.

JEWISH AND MESSIANIC PERSPECTIVE:

I’m reminded of what I love most about my Jewish culture. When you are Jewish, it’s unheard of to have a celebration without a song and a dance. Davidic dancing, or dancing in a circle is something we do for fun and rejoicing. We sing and dance at weddings and at Shabbat Service on Saturdays. It is tasteful dancing, praising the creator of the universe and giving thanks.  (To check out FREE or affordable Israeli dance classes in your area, check out http://www.israelidance.com)

Though there are many bills to pay and miracles that I am awaiting, I forget all my worries and cares and remember what it means to come to the Lord like a child. Let’s learn to sing and dance and thank God even when things are not perfect.

LET'S PRAY:

Lord, I ask you for strength. Give me a heart of gratitude. Help me to sing and dance like a child. Let me experience your joy!!!

TO JOIN MY MUSIC TOGETHER CLASS THIS APRIL  (UNDER DIRECTOR,  KYM JOHNSON) 

OR GET MORE INFO, CLICK HERE: http://musiccitymusictogether.com.

New classes begin before April. Registration OPEN NOW! J see you there!

Beauty and the Beast... When you just don't feel beautiful

So Joe and I go to a party. We're talking to a new friend, and Joe says, "You know, people often call us beauty and the beast. But I don't think she's a beast!" 


They all laugh cuz they think I am beautiful and he's the beast. Or they laugh because they think he is adorable and cute and not a beast! I don't know. But it's funny and it always makes me laugh. 
I heard Marty Goetz (a singer I really like who sounds like Josh Groben goes to Jerusalem) sing Beauty and the Beast. In his version, we feel like beasts, but God imparts His beauty to us. It was Marty who gave me the idea for this blog. 


To all you ladies reading this who don't feel pretty, and to the men who feel insecure: Perhaps you feel overweight or like you don't measure up the way you would like. I want to admit to you that I sometimes feel the same way. We all do. I take comfort in the fact that our King and Daddy in Heaven removes the "beast" in us and makes us His beauties when we allow Him to fill us with His love, and when we ask him to help us change our attitudes about ourselves. 


Overcoming / 12- Step Perspective: 
Just for today, I will accept myself and who God made me to be. I am not where I want to be but I am not where I used to be. The serenity prayer asks God to give me the peace to accept what I cannot change and so on...and the courage to change what I can. 


WHAT CAN I CHANGE? My attitude.  I can "ACT AS IF," a popular concept from Dale Carnegie, meaning - act like what you know God made you to be, and your mind and heart will be happier. I can also change what I eat, I can wear clothes that make me feel beautiful, and brush my hair and walk like a princess belonging to a God who thinks I am beautiful. I cannot change my weight in one day. It's a process!!! I CAN love myself as my DADDY IN HEAVEN's daughter and princess and let the beauty of the Lord shine through me today.




Isaiah 62:3-5
Then you will be called by a new name which Adonai himself will pronounce
You will be a glorious crown in the hand of Adonai, a royal diadem held by your God... For adonai delghts in you...your God will rejoice over you.

Proverbs 31:30 (Complete Jewish Bible)

 Charm is a lie, and beauty can vanish;
       but a woman who fears Adonai should be praised.

Messianic Perspective:
The Lord , in Isaiah 62 is talking to my Jewish friends who do not yet know the Messiah, Yeshua. When my Jewish people confess and beleive Yeshua is the Messiah, they will be crown in the hands of God- beautiful inside and out and priceless like a royal diadem. My Jewish Mom and brother and friends will be ROYALTY in the sight of God- God's little princesses and princes!


LET NO ONE EVER SAY THAT MY JEWISH PEOPLE WHO DO NOT BELIEVE IN MESSIAH YET ARE FORGOTTEN BY GOD! (Book of Romans, Chapter 11 at the end says All of Israel WILL BE SAVED!) Messiah will present Himself to all the Jewish people and they will believe.
The reason it says the Jewish people "Will be" a glorious crown, is because without the Messiah, we cannot approach the Father who is perfect and Holy. 


We are reminded of the holiday of Yom Kippur when Jewish people fast for their sin to be forgiven by a perfect and Holy God. Many of my Jewish friends feel they are really NOT FORGIVEN.  I think it is because this ritual of fasting for day for forgiveness of sin is not from the Holy Scriptures but instead, created by man. The scriptures say that there must be the shedding of blood of a perfect lamb for forgiveness. (Book of Leviticus chapter 17:6) Jesus or Yeshua was that perfect lamb. Yochanan (John) saw Him and said, "Look! There is the Lamb of God, Who takes away the sin of the world! (John 1:29)


If you know Yeshua today and He lives in your heart, YOU HAVE BEEN MADE BEAUTIFUL! AND MORE IMPORTANTLY THAN BEING BEAUTIFUL ON THE INSIDE, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL IN HEAVEN'S EYES! NOW THAT IS A BEAUTY WHICH SHALL NEVER FADE...THE LOVE OF A FATHER IN HEAVEN FOR HIS DAUGHTERS AND SONS.


LET US PRAY:
AVINU MALCHENU, my Father and King, help me love and accept myself today and see the beauty within me as YOU DO! Fill me with acceptance and help me release control over what I cannot change today. Fill me with your beauty and grace. Help me share your beauty with each precious person you place in my path today. Amen.


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Michelle Gold Music: Often described as "Celine and Mariah meet Y'shua (Jesus) in Jerusalem." 

Vision: Spreading a contagious passion for proclaiming the good news of Y'shua to Jews and gentiles worldwide

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CAN SOMEONE TELL ME THE ANSWER ALREADY!!!!????

What ARE YOU thinking about today? WANTING ANSWERS?

I am thinking about all the times I go onto GOOGLE to find answers to questions I have. I read all these great blogs by people just like me. 

But can't I just talk to the experts and get the answers!? I realize today that the problem is, often, the best answers are the ones we discover ourselves! THE BEST ANSWERS ARE OFTEN THE ONES WE DISCOVER AS WE EXPLORE OPPORTUNITIES.  Sounds deep huh? 

I put the experts in my life on pedestals sometimes as if they are mini-gods. Oh Lord, my God, forgive me for this. 

 Lots of answers can be aquired from asking our doctors, lawyers and couselors, other people who do what I do- and do it better than me. 

BUT I RECALL TODAY THAT THERE ARE SOME ANSWERS GOD WISHES FOR US TO FIND ON OUR OWN. He knows we need to find it by searching, the search (the process) itself makes us wise, and in the end, it makes us a blessing to others. If we have all this information, we can teach others and help them when they have a need.

WHAT DOES SCRIPTURE SAY?

 Luke 22:31 says "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."

This scripture above could take up pages of explanation. I encourage you to google it...to go more in depth...LOL I LEAD YOU TO GOOLE! I am not a Bible scholar and Baby Bella is waiting for me so I only want to touch upon the latter part of the scripture if you don't mind. What I notice is Yeshua telling Simon and showing us that because of the process and pain we have gone through, we will be able to use that pain to strengthen others. 

STRENGTHEN: (transitive) To animate; to give moral strength; to encourage; to fix in resolution; to hearten.

(http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/strengthen)

Just for today, I can know that my searching for answers will be used to bring joy to others one day. Perhaps the answers I find will be answers that will help someone else.

UNTIL I FIND THOSE ANSWERS:

 I might even DECIDE TO ENJOY THE SEARCH! What a novel idea! It might be painful to NOT KNOW, but I can decide to enjoy my day whether I have found what I need or not. Why? Because I am loved and have the blessing of giving love. My joy is based on the love of God and not on people, places and things. And certainly, I WILL NOT ALLOW MY JOY TO BE BASED ON HAVING MY QUESTIONS ANSWERED! So SELF! Get outa the way! This little Jewish girl from Brooklyn is gonna enjoy this day!

WE CAN DECIDE/CHOOSE to enjoy this day. The scriptures say THIS IS THE DAY THE LORD HAS MADE, LET US REJOICE AND BE GLAD IN IT! 

Step 1 (The 12-steps of AA and Alanon) says "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol (people places and things) - that our lives had become unmanageable. (I added text in parentheses which can be used for those who are overcoming from other addicitions- like addictions to obsessing)

King David said this in Psalm 131:1 

 "Lord, my heart is not proud;
      my eyes are not haughty.
   I don’t concern myself with matters too great
      or too awesome for me to grasp"

LET'S PRAY...

AVINU MACHENU, My Father and King,

I admit to you today that I am powerless over people places and things. I am powerless to change the fact that I don't yet have answers to my questions. I surrender all to you and enjoy THE NOT KNOWING. After all, YOU KNOW WHAT IS BEST FOR ME! (Isaiah 48:17)  Speak to my heart as I read your instructions for life (The Word of God) and journal about my cares. LET ME SEARCH FOR YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE I KNOW! Let me rejoice that I know You, Y'shua know all the answers and that You are on my side and living in me to guide me. Amen.

DAYENU! The God who is more than enough for us

^{Psalm 37: 18-19} 
Day by day the Lord takes care of the innocent,
and they will receive an inheritance that lasts forever.
They will not be disgraced in hard times;
even in famine they will have more than enough.


TRUSTING GOD FOR MORE THAN ENOUGH! Oh My Gosh, it should totally NOT BE ME writing this! I have so much to learn about trusting God- especially when it comes to money/provision. In these hard economic times, even those who were wealthy are struggling. Everyone is suffering a little I think...right?


What did I learn about trust growing up?
I was brought up in a reformed Jewish family in Old Mill Basin Brooklyn. Yes! I am a little Jewish girl from Brooklyn. We were taught that God existed but that he was very far away, perhaps too far to make personal and detailed requests. We were taught that education was our greatest goal and money and love came in a close first or second or somewhere in between. I was told that when I grew up, I should become a laywer or doctor, or marry one!!!! LOL


Here I am in Nashville, TN now married almost 11 years to a youth pastor/tent maker. (tent-maker meaning he works in the corp. world by day and preaches by night or weekend) My parents were not thrilled that I married a Christian man at first. But seeing how real and genuine and loving Joe was, they came to LOVE Joe in a very special way. He cares about them like no one else does. That's Joe- my sweet man that I cherish, sent to me by God. 


So trusting God was TOTALLY NOT something I learned growing up. So where do we go now? Well, I look at scripture and then I learn from my favorite program- the 12-step program, balanced in it's approach, originally based on scripture and started by Christians. 




To reflect on the scripture above first:
It says God will give us MORE THAN ENOUGH or as we say in Hebrew, DAYENU! (pronounced Die-aye-nu) At Passover we sing a song that says Dayenu. You might know my song Dayenu as well- sort of a youthful version of the good old traditional. We say in the song, that if God only gave us His book of instructions- His Word, His Torah, we would have said- that's sufficient. If God would have given us the day of rest, it would have been sufficient, and so on,


I believe the song is saying that when God blesses us or gives us what we need or provides for us, it's like, an un-explainable shower of love and goodness that looks like niagra falls! We say DAYENU TO GOD recognizing that He is OUR PROVIDER AND GIVES US MORE THAN WE ASK FOR OR IMAGINE if we just believe and sometimes even when we foolishly don't.


Let's look at Step Three of the 12-step program:
Step 3 says "Make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of a God, as we understand him." The God of my understanding is Y'shua. It's clear after reading some of the over 500 references in the Hebrew Scriptures over the years that these references are describing the Messiah and they are describing Jesus or Yeshua in Hebrew. (See http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=isaiah%2053&version=NIV) If you read my testimony, you'll see that I have seen He is Messiah in so many ways- through reading the proof in the Bible, from being healed of anxiety and seeing him answer prayer when I pray in HIS name.


Make a DECISION to turn my will over? Oy boy, I am quite indecisive. So this is gonna hurt! LOL. I cant even decide what to wear in the morning let alone decide to turn my life over!!! Lol. But I have decided that HE is all knowing and all powerful and that he knows what is best for me. (Isaiah 48:17) Turning my Will and life over to God? Can't just say it with my lips. Must mean it. I do this by "taking the actions (I need to take) and letting go of the results." Or, doing what I CAN do and letting go of what I CANNOT do. (See the Serenity Prayer)


For example, If I have trouble trusting God about provision, I make a list of some things I CAN do- baby steps- like- if I have a business, an example would be 
"TO DO: acquire more clients in my business, call 3 people today who are interested"
Then, I LET GO OF THE RESULTS after doing those things. 


Meaning, at the end of the day, I close the books, the to do lists, the computer and exhale. I did what I was called to do, now I am gonna let God do the rest.


Not only will He provide more than enough. BUt also, HIS LOVE is more than enough for us. Like a child embraces her Mommy or daddy, I pray we all embrace HIM today and rest in Him.


Hope this blessed you. Love to hear from YOU. I ask that you keep the focus on yourself- your relationship with God and what has worked for you. Everything I have ever learned or gained was usually from someone else's experience, not preaching. LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! Thanks for listening!